P is thinking of giving up NaNo. 

I’ve never met anyone who’s completed NaNoWriMo the way I do. Right now, I feel like I’m doing the normal course of NaNo — I’m many thousands of words behind (at 13,000 words, instead of almost 27,000) and feeling the drag of week two. But you know, in my first year, it was easy to write 1,666 words. It was easy the second year and the third. And I’m starting to wonder why it is that NaNo is such a good thing for me. 

And I think its because I commit to writing a bad book. I sit down and just let it flow and it comes out bad. But you know what, I have nine bad novels written, soon to be ten. I have worked out some kinks in my writing, figured out how to plot, committed to writing the bad book

If you don’t write the bad book, than you can’t write the good one. Good ones don’t just appear out of no where as a “side project”. You have to practice. You have to practice writing and do it a lot and keep going and not give up and finish the damn thing, and commit to writing the bad book, because its going to be bad. First drafts are always bad. You have to get through it or you’ll never finish any book. 

And now I’m just sad because bad books are easy to write. Its words, and more words. Its so much easier to write a bad book, to let go of the fact that it should be perfect, that slow writing is good writing. And I think P could write a good bad first draft, and it would be fantastic and give her something real. But she’s gotten caught on the fact that she needs to write well.

And being human, she’s explained it all away into another form which makes it much harder to argue with her about it. And at this moment, its breaking me. J does this too, where he says he has to really let the characters marinate. It’s been seven years J, FINISH THE DAMN BOOK. 

Commit to writing the bad book, and you’ll get some good things. Don’t wallow. I don’t have time for this bullshit.


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